Before we get to some exciting news, let us first set the stage for you.
By now you’re probably all familiar with the McPlot that occurred in Vocal Point over the last four years. If for some reason you aren’t, or if you need a brush-up, please go read The Great McButters Conspiracy to Decrease the Overall Height of Vocal Point right now. Essentially, McCrockett worked for the first three years of his VP tenure to flood the group with shawties, weeding out those who were too tall through all sorts of McDevious means. And by looking at the 2010-2011 line-up, it’s clear that his efforts were largely successful.
But then something strange happened. The McPlot began to unravel. Our most promising current hypothesis is that the delay in auditions in the fall of 2011 (because of the Sing-off) threw off the carefully calibrated mechanisms McGetsMyWay had put in place to ensure that no one of great height made it into VP. By the time auditions took place in November, things were spiraling so far out of control that this disaster occurred:
Every single one of the New Guys failed to meet the standards of the McPlot. This was a total disaster.
Forced to live out the last months of his time in Vocal Point in McFailure and disgrace, McSchemey had one last chance to turn things around and make the McPlot a success. Even on his way out, if he could somehow make sure that the New New Guys reversed the height-increasing trend, he could still leave VP with his short little head held as high as it could reach.
But we all know that isn’t what happened. In fact, as we can see in this video, the addition of the New New Guys cemented the status of the McPlot as being a bust.
Prince Trevortastic even says it right in the video, “The McPlot is over.”
But did you watch all of the way to the end? Did you see McSeeminglyDefeated hang his head in shame? No, no you did not. Because that’s not how McButters handles adversity. Instead, he raises his McFist of Fury into the air and begins to plot anew.
If it is no longer possible to maintain the short-statured ideal version of Vocal Point, how can McMeMeMe still manage to exert his will over the group? Especially considering that his time with the group is drawing to a close? The saying goes, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. But what if you didn’t apply to grad school like your McBestie and therefore can’t join ’em?
What is left for McDesperate to do?
If you can’t join ’em…
Rule over them.
That’s right, in a heard-it-here-first TMtP McAuthorized news break, we can tell you that McKay McButters McCrockett has been offered and has accepted the position of Vocal Point Director.
Now don’t worry, he didn’t have to “get rid of” the delightful James Stevens in any malicious way to make this happen. James, who has been such an amazing driving force behind VP for the past several years, has decided that he is ready to move on, and it is into this void that McOverlord steps. He may not have been able to keep the Talls out of the group, but in his new position, they will all have to follow his lead and do as he says.
So we say, let the McReign begin!
We see you’re working the thumbs up in that photo, but if you want to switch to ruling with an iron fist, go for it. When the democratic nature of VP auditions leads to your McPlot falling apart, and you later find yourself in a position of power, that can only mean one thing.
It’s time for you to become…
-Troi and Crusher
PS – McDictator shirts are now available in our Spreadshirt shop. Show your support for the new man in charge.